No Good Men

I give up. There is no hope for me in finding a man. Really. I’m serious. I give up.

This weekend was an interesting one. We went to “Cheers” on Friday night and on the other side of the bar was a guy who I had a little something with several months ago.  We only met in person once but every now and again we do still hear from each other.

**Flashback** 
He was a man who I met on MySpace shortly after I signed up.  Actually, I met him at about the same time as Blue Eyes.  We IMed a lot over a few weeks.  There was an obvious attraction between us so one night we decided to meet.  We were meeting at “Cheers” but I had to get ready, shower and all, before I headed out.  I missed the part of him saying he’d meet me there and then gave me his phone number.  I accidentally closed the window before I saw that.  So, I was waiting by my computer for him to log on and tell me what the plan was.  Oops.  A while later he went back home and logged on.  Even with all the confusion we still decided we should meet…tonight.  So, I drove over to his house where the attraction was even more pronounced.  No, I didn’t sleep with him.  C’mon.  I’m not THAT bad of a girl.  However, I did get to see everything he had to offer. 

That was the only time I had seen him in person…until Friday night.  Neither of us went up to each other but on his way out of the bar he acknowledged me with a wink.

 

Be Very Selective with Your Phone Number

The Needy Guy from MySpace apparently thought it would be ok if he called me at 2:15 am this morning.  HELLO!  Some of us work in the morning.  I’m sure he went out last night since yesterday and today the teachers here had off.  SO CALL ME AT FUCKING 2:15 AM?  I was just starting to fall asleep after being over ambitious with posting last night.  (I stayed up way past my bedtime.)  The thing that really makes me mad about this is that I’ve only talked to the guy once since that night when I told him he was needy.  Even that conversation was a ‘hi, how you doing, I’m busy, talk to you later’ conversation. 

Girls, let this be a lesson, and my Dating Rule #4: Be VERY Selective with Your Phone Number.  (If you missed my other rules, or need a refresher, follow this link.) Some boys just don’t know how to deal with the responsibility of having it.  Once they obtain the power of the phone number it can’t be taken back.  You might get the phone calls that you inevitable screen because you can’t believe this ass is calling after you reemed him a new one.  Or, like me, you get the drunk calls.  I used to welcome this behavior from one of my boyfriends when we were in college.  It was good to know that he was thinking about me at bar time and that he was alone in his bed.  (We were 6 hrs away from each other.)  I even welcome those calls from friends if they just need someone to talk to.  I don’t mind.  But little drunk boys that I have hardly spoken to in a month, HELL NO!  Even MBA had a lapse in judgement the other night.  He called at 11:30.  He was 2 time zones away though, so it made it a reasonable hour where he was and I also told him that I’m usually up until 12.  I’ll forgive him for that since I really was awake but I was writing a new post and was caught up in it.  I just couldn’t stop writing to chat. 

It’s because of incidents like this that I typically refuse to date guys that my age or younger.  MBA is about my age but honestly, I feel more comfortable with a guy when I find out he’s at least 5 yrs older than me.  I blame the Old Man for this.  As for the Needy Guy, who’s about 5 yrs younger than me, I hope his phone falls into a puddle of beer the next time he’s out so not only can he not call me but he also loses my number. :)

View more of my dating rules.

 

Relationships Are Like Bars

In my drunken wisdom Friday night, I came up with this observation. Relationships are like bars. It’s true! Why?

#1 If one gets boring, average, or is no longer fun, there’s always another one around the corner. This is best summed up by the typical comment made to a friend that has recently left a relationship, “There’s other fish in the sea.” If one’s not good enough the next might be. Just keep trying them on until you find a good match. One that feels like home. I’ve found the bar that feels like home now I need to find the relationship.

#2 After waiting an hour to get the attention of just one bartender, you finally place your order. Then, as soon as that bartender turns around another bartender asks what you want, and then another. Don’t they know you’ve placed your order? Know you’ve been taken? This is almost always true in my life. After several months of not having one date, someone finally asks you out. You have a great time and plan to see each other again. Shortly there after, another person asks you on a date, and then another, and another. When it rains, it pours. Until finally your social schedule is full and you sit back wondering how you could possibly choose between them. Then get mad that they all came at you at the same time.

#3 You spend hours on hair and makeup yet no one notices. Getting all gussied up to go into a dark and smelly bar where no one can tell that you did your eye shadow differently or your lipstick is new. No one can see it! Just like with men. They don’t care if you spent 10 mins getting ready or 5 hours. At the end of the night they won’t remember what color your shoes were anyway.

#4 You can talk but no one is listening. The music is so loud in the joint that even if your friends try, they can’t here you. It’s like playing that game telephone when you whisper something into your friends ear and they whisper it to the next and so on until the last person is reached. Then they say what they think they heard which is never the same as what was originally said. No matter how hard you try to understand your partners thoughts and feelings there is always something left out in the translation.

#5 No matter how much you drink, how tired you are you, or how irritated you become you have the comfort in knowing that you can go home. This is the part that I am missing in my life. The comfort of having someone who let’s me be who I am. Someone who supports me and holds me up when I’m down. A man that even at my worst will love me.